Are we our own worst Enemy?

No one can deny the overtly sexual nature of lgbt culture. The movement uses campaigns such as "no hate" and "come clean" with half naked pics, every gay event is advertised with shirtless six pack guys, pride parades filled with naked people marching, yet we proclaim all we want is to be able to love. When has sex and love become one and the same? Why is the gay culture so sexualized? Is it because we as a movement have not moved on from the culture of the 70s? How can we expect to be considered "just like everyone else" when we don't act like it? 

Then there is the issue of stigma between our community. The level of perfection that is expected within the gay community is that everyone look like a model. We also have a subculture of using porn stars as celebrities, not to mention the invention of the hookup app which is arguably destroying relationship ideals single handily. is this normal? Are we our own worst enemy? I write this as I sit in a gay club and look around and see the insecurity and feel the judgment in the air. How do we overcome this battle? Or is it not even a battle at all?

Thoughts?

Pardon spelling mistakes I typed this on an iPhone.